“I’m scared.” I heard the words through a fog of sleep and woke up. Did I dream that or really hear it? Then I realized my clock radio was blaring NPR, telling a story about the fears of healthcare workers fighting the coronavirus in New York City. Later that day, I heard from a friend how her shipboard suggestion box was crammed with angry, frustrated comments. Like medical and first responders, our sailors are among the small group of Americans who have little choice but to man the front lines in fighting the coronavirus. As a veteran myself, my initial reaction was, “How dare a sailor say that!” But as a therapist, my inner voice—that of experience—pointed out, “It’s not disrespect, but stress and fear that’s talking”. Like it or not, sailors are human too!
So how do we address sailors’ fears and those of their families and still keep them ready and resilient? I spent 24 years in the Navy, and have led the Operational Stress team as well as other initiatives to help sailors deal with the unique challenges of a life in the Sea Service. Here are a few thoughts that connect to the five elements of resilience.
- Controllability. Follow all CDC and Navy guidance concerning social distancing, meetings, activities, and so forth to the greatest extent possible. While this may seem obvious, there may be some leaders out there who still do not take it seriously or who think that mission readiness takes precedence over sailor readiness. Good leaders know that this is a false choice—the two are inextricably intertwined. Remember, your ship, submarine, or squadron is only as ready as your sailors are ready.
- Trust. Acknowledge fears. Listen to your sailors and take their concerns seriously. As we know, courage is not the absence of fear, but rather action in the face of fear. A good leader can acknowledge not only their sailors’ fears but also his or her own fears. It is a “we are in this together” stance. Some sailors may have exceptional family members or elderly parents at home and are concerned about contracting the virus and spreading it to them. (While some sailors may have the luxury of isolating in a separate room in their home, many do not live in large enough homes where that is possible.) Others may have family in the country’s “hot spots” or may have family members who are already sick or in the hospital. Now is not the time to meet their fears with a “suck it up” attitude.
- Predictability. Sailors will pretty much do anything asked of them if they understand it. Communicate, communicate, communicate. All Hands and other formal meetings are fine. But smaller conversations are where the real communication happens. Take the time to talk with each sailor who works directly for you. The Navy has a “1 Small Act” campaign which emphasizes “Every Sailor Every Day.” The bottom line is for someone in the chain of command to talk to every sailor in the command every day to check on him or her to see how they are doing mentally and physically. That is important now more than ever. The commanding officer or command master chief should not have to do it all. This is a direct supervisor function, but it starts at the top.
- Meaning. Explain the “Why.” If you are having to carry out drills and certifications, explain the why more than you normally do. Why? Because we are in extraordinary times, and if people understand more of the why they are likely to feel less anxious. Your sailors understand the mission and the need to accept some risk to meet it.
- Relationships. Ask for help. If you or someone in your command is struggling, ask for help, find someone to talk to. That can be a trusted friend or mentor, a chaplain, or a therapist. We know that sometimes just sharing the burden of our thoughts helps to lessen that burden. As a therapist, I feel so honored to be invited into the lives of my clients, especially when it helps to lessen the burden they are carrying. Fleet and Family Support Centers are still available to provide support fleetwide. And now, online therapy is more the norm than in-person therapy and almost all insurance companies are reimbursing for teletherapy.
Finally, take care of yourself—physically and mentally. As a leader and as a sailor, your mental and physical health starts with taking personal responsibility for both. This is more important now than ever; lack of fitness, stress and lack of sleep all erode immunity. Eat well, drink plenty of water, get a minimum of 6-7 hours of sleep, exercise 3-4 times a week (or at least walk around instead of sitting!), practice diaphragmatic breathing (slow your breathing, breathe deeply), be grateful (recent studies show it can improve mental health). Not only will it help you function better but it will also boost your immunity.
Every day it becomes more apparent that the fight against COVID-19 will be a marathon, not a sprint. While the apex of the crisis may be past in a matter of weeks, this not the time to relax. In fact, it is the time to be even more diligent and to actively check on the mental health of sailors and their families. When in the midst of battle, we are by necessity focused on the fight. Experience has shown that after it passes we may expect some of the mental health fallout, making it even more important to do all we can now to build and maintain resilience.
